Guess Who’s Back? Back Again. Insert Eminem lyrics here.

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So yeah, I’ve been away.  Thanks for the emails of concern.  No, I didn’t have a vicodin overdose–why? what did you hear?  

I’ve been working my ass off for Mr. G and unfortunately he’s been flitting around my desk so I haven’t been able to blog.  And when I wasn’t working, I went on yet another date. Shocker, right?  More on that this week.  Let’s just say if someone puts comic books under “interests” in a personal profile, RUN.

Anyway, I did manage to get a lot of fundraising in for you Californians for “No on 8.”  Selfishly, I’m doing it to help Christopher get married.  However, we did raise some dough and my fingers (and legs) are crossed that the amendment is defeated.  The boys and I did have a lot of fun harassing a lot of the “Yes on Prop 8″ people on YouTube.  What do most of them all have in common?  They’re all mormons.

Funny, if you take the second “m” out of Mormons you get something more akin to what this particular sect of Mormons actually are:  Mormons=Morons.  I’m just saying… 

Hmmm… Now, I’m not one to EVER rip on someone else’s religion–except when their bigotry hurts the ones that I love.  And guess what? The claws just came out.  

(Before you send me hate filled emails, I’m referring to a particular group of people of the Mormon faith who have tirelessly tried to remove a basic human right in the name of religion.  To say all Mormons are this way would be ridiculous.)

ANYWAY… Back to MY LIFE

All of my gay friends have been in a bit of a  ”gay panic” these last few weeks and it’s driving me nuts. 

The Economy you say?  ”No on Proposition 8″ in California, right? I’ve got it–the election, of course!  

No to all of the above.  

What my gay posse is most concerned about is what the hell are we going to do now that Rachel Zoe is gone!

Rachel darling, you are the frosting on a cupcake from Billy’s Bakery. You’re that delicious.

I’m the first to admit I was ready to hate her and the show as were my boys.  But come on, let’s be honest gays and gals, she’s got access to De La Renta, Dior, and Louboutin.  Not to mention she comes across incredibly endearing.  She seriously rocks.  

The NY Daily News called her a pox on humanity–i mean, really?  

If Rachel Zoe is a pox on humanity, then The Daily News is humanity’s gonorrhea. 

What are my friends and I going to do without Taylor, the angry blonde assistant who is obsessed with her eighties “Risky Business” sunglasses and her obvious girl crush on “The Zoe”?  My boys and I aren’t saying she’s a lesbian, but we’re saying she’s a lesbian. I mean who else would hate the terrifically effeminate 2nd assistant, Brad, but a butch lesbian?  Straight women, like “The Zoe,” would adore Brad’s keen fashion sense and ass-kissing ways.  Trust me, I’m one of them.  But honestly, we love you Taylor and frankly we’re a little bit frightened of you too.

But Brad, please stop your crying for godssake.  It’s embarrassing.  We particularly loved how you made your fuck-up that caused Rachel a minor meltdown all about you.  Score one for the gay!

And how about the hair and make-up guy who rarely takes off his sunglasses?  I hate to tell her this, but the role of Anna Wintour has already been cast. Take off your sunglasses, you’re very cute–show off the eyes.  Besides,

The only people that wear sunglasses indoors are blind people and douche bags.  

(Rachel is excused of course as she’s the doyenne of style)

And then there’s Rodger…Wow. Okay, you’re all thinking it. So it doesn’t need to be said.  Rach, feel free to call me.  I’ve been there.  Many, many, times. 

I’m off to bed, and my TiVo awaits.  I’ll be falling asleep tonite to Rachel screaming “I die!”  But don’t die Rachel, because I need you back next year.

*More tomorrow. Lots of gossip with the boys, the wedding, and of course comic book guy.*

 

xoxo

Farrah

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